Ode to Mr. Gray

Today is my cat's last day here. He is nineteen years old and in failing health. Making the decision to put an animal to 'sleep,' as we so innocently call it, is not an easy decision. We have known for quite a long time that our cat was in declining health. With a large tumor that was inoperable-the doctors said an operation, while possible, would most certainly kill the cat. Hormones to make him more comfortable were possible and tried. Spitting out his pills daily, I didn't have the will to force him to take them. As life went on, our cat, a gray, neutered male lived on and one. One of the most stubborn, willful animals I have had the pleasure to live with!

He was part of our family for such a long time. He outlived his mother KC by a year. When he was born, he was part of a litter of seven kittens. He was the only gray one and always seemed part siamese due to his incessant meowing. He had us trained to open the door for him ( would knock our pottery off the counter if he couldn't get our attention), feed him on demand (same annoying habit) even though he had plenty of food in his bowl, and trip us up while walking. The last came about from growing up with our dog Beauty. They would sleep together, as Mr. Gray's mother, also living with us, soundly rejected him with fierce swats across the face. He really identified with Beauty. As Beauty had part sheep herder in her, Mr. Gray must have observed the herding instinct as for most of life he would walk with us at the heel and then cut in front of us to direct us the way he wanted.

My husband swore that Mr. Gray wanted to kill him as he would often herd him at night when he was walking back from our studio up to the house. We think it was an unfortunate behavioral trait that he couldn't help. He just thought that he was a dog, like Beauty. Maybe being a dog gave him more status. Since his mother was so openly hostile and also the favored cat, a sweet calico with no annoying traits, I am sure that if he couldn't be a real dog in this life, he will come back as one in the next!

Many people, including myself, believe that living with animals is a special honor. Whatever we experience with these creatures, they are always teaching us lessons about our life. Reflecting back our emotional state they teach us to care for the most vulnerable. Even if most animals could hunt and exist in society apart from the home environment, as many homeless animals do contracting disease, the cat or dog choose to eat our prepared meals and manufactured animal chow. They love us to feed them; they love us to care for them. They seem to be love junkies and then give that love back to us when we love them.

Cats are peculiar animals and some people are called cat people and some people are called dog people. If you are an animal lover, you recognize the essence of spirit in every creature, big and small, dog or cat, donkey or goat, bird or turtle. You are kind to them, try to do your best to make them comfortable, take care of their needs and let them surprise you with their fun, amusing, unique, annoying feats.

Mr. Gray you are one of a kind. I will look for you to return but please don't be a herder next time!